Monday, November 17, 2008

Kamana Reflection

It's been almost four years since I signed up for the Kamana program. There is four levels to it, and for some who are really dedicated it can take just over a year to complete. I'm over half way through it and not particularily proud of it. I told myself that after we moved into our cordwood house I was going to start visiting my sit spot again. Well, we've been living in here for almost a month and I haven't visited it yet. So I've been thinking a lot about why I'm stuck in this program. I figure if I can help build a house from scratch and remain debt free (except for a few credit card bills) I should be able to complete this program.

Last week I asked what the definition of vision was. I quoted Daniel Quinn out of Beyond Civilization trying to come to some kind of understanding what this invisible thing we call vision is. I find myself going back to the section about vision in Beyond Civilization trying to understand why I'm having a hard time finishing this program.

Every year, without fail, we outlaw more things, catch more people doing them, and put more of them in jail. The outlawed behavior never goes away, because, directly or indirectly, it's supported by the strong, invisible, unrelenting force called vision. This explains why police officers are much more likely to take up crime than criminals are to take up law enforcement. It's called "going with the flow." pg.17


Like the police officers in Quinn's example, perhaps I'm going more with the flow of our culture at this point in time. There really is no external reward (Like getting paid to do it.) for doing what is required in the Kamana program. To put it simply, the program doesn't pay the bills. This makes me wonder how much different this Kamana journey would be for me if I got paid for my time doing it?

7 comments:

Willem said...

In fact, I wonder how much the "kamana program" would feel different if instead of solo workbooks and assignments, it consisted of group experiences and collaborative storytelling.

do we need to do schooling better and focus it on important things, or do we need to fundamentally change the way we think about learning? And walk away from schooling entirely?


Your comment about not feeling "proud" of your progress in kamana gives me chills, for reasons I think you can guess. I suppose if you finished really fast, you would feel "proud".

But what exactly would you have accomplished?

anyway, i like the direction of your inquiry. :)

Curt said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Curt said...

Hi Willem,

Back and Forth:

You wrote: "In fact, I wonder how much the "kamana program" would feel different if instead of solo workbooks and assignments, it consisted of group experiences and collaborative storytelling."

ME: I think it would feel much different. A group of like-minded people to share my experiences and vision with would make a big difference. And I think this goes back to the police officers being more apt to take up criminal activities in Daniel Quinn's example. Most people are just going with the flow, for now.

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You wrote: "do we need to do schooling better and focus it on important things, or do we need to fundamentally change the way we think about learning? And walk away from schooling entirely?"

ME: Yes, we need to walk away from schooling entirely. The problem is there aren't enough people in my community who want to do it yet.

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You wrote: Your comment about not feeling "proud" of your progress in kamana gives me chills, for reasons I think you can guess. I suppose if you finished really fast, you would feel "proud".

But what exactly would you have accomplished?

ME: Well, probably not to much. I have to admit though, I have learned things in the Kamana program that I won't forget. But the feeling of not feeling proud is a problem. Now I ask myself what do I want out of the program? Or maybe how can this program help others in my community?

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You wrote: "anyway, i like the direction of your inquiry. :)"

ME: Thank you. And thank you for taking the time to respond to it.

Willem said...

Also, I don't wish to rub salt in your wound over not having a group to rewild with.

I just have a deep feeling that we could find a third handle to this issue too; not schooling vs. immersion in a group of people rewilding, but a third handle.

Like, maybe finding old hunters to learn from? Or birders? Or starting a storytelling circle for gardeners? Maybe incorporating the kamana assignments into these group experiences somehow?

You could probably talk a group of gardeners into doing secret spots in their back yards to observe the yearly round and such.

I don't know; everyone, everywhere has these same struggles as you, including myself, and so I keep wondering about finding that third handle.

Jeremy said...

Curt,

You and I are very much a like. I also struggle with getting into those routines (sit spot, journaling, routines of invisibility, tracking, asking the sacred questions, etc). I also am a tracker student. I went through the Kamana program when I was living in Colorado, going to school and pretty-much un-employed. I know that when I was sitting everday, when I was asking the sacred question, when I was meditating and journaling, amazing things happened in my life. I could manifest things, my thinking was clear, answers to questions came from nowhere. That is the magic of the Kamana program and just that simple way of living.

Anyway, back to the motivation issue. What motivates me the most is my two young boys. I want to bring them up learning/living these skills. I don't want them to suffer for my own "nature deficencies" and lack of awareness. What motivated me in the past was competition between a close friend of mine who was also doing the Kamana and sit spot routines.

Curt said...

Hi Willem,

Back and Forth:

You wrote "Also, I don't wish to rub salt in your wound over not having a group to rewild with."

ME: I don't feel like you're rubbing salt in my wound. Like you said, it's a tough situation to be in all around.

Like always, I appreciate you're suggestions about finding a third handle. I'm slowly building relationships with like minded people in my community, and that feels good. At times I just wish we could be on the same page that some of us are on the internet.

Curt said...

Hi Jeremy,

Back and Forth:

You wrote: "I know that when I was sitting everday, when I was asking the sacred question, when I was meditating and journaling, amazing things happened in my life I could manifest things, my thinking was clear, answers to questions came from nowhere. That is the magic of the Kamana program and just that simple way of living."

ME: "Yes, I've had similar experiences, and I think you've described those experiences well. I think knowing there were others in my community going through the Kamana experience would help alot.

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You wrote:"Anyway, back to the motivation issue. What motivates me the most is my two young boys. I want to bring them up learning/living these skills. I don't want them to suffer for my own "nature deficencies" and lack of awareness. What motivated me in the past was competition between a close friend of mine who was also doing the Kamana and sit spot routines."

ME:Thank you for sharing this. I have a 9 yr. old son, and some of the Kamana knowledge has rubbed off on him. It's amazing what kids pick up on. A few years back he said to a friend and I that the land owns us, we don't own the land. To my mind, that's a profound statement!

Your story about having a close friend to motivate you through the program reminds me of what Barbara Sher talks about in her book WISHCRAFT. Knowing that someone else is striving towards the same goal and will be there to push you along at times is powerful, I think.